We ran to the grocery store to pick up a few items. For me the conversation unfolded like this:
”Do we have a disposable aluminum pan at home?” she asked.
”I think we do. I am not sure if we had one left from the last time we made the banana dessert,” I replied.
With a puzzled look, she said, “I don’t think we have any cream cheese.”
“What?” I asked, confused by her reply.
I needed to clarify. The conversation didn’t make sense to me. I’ll also admit that while this exchange occurred, we were walking down aisles of the store and I was focused on finding other items on the list.
Lost in translation
In a fast-paced world, I wonder how often I miss what is being communicated because my mind is elsewhere. Communication largely depends on listening. Good communication requires listening to understand, not just listening to reply.
Here’s the other perspective of that same conversation:
”We have a disposable aluminum pan at home,” she said.
”I’m not sure if we have the stuff left from the last time we made banana dessert,” I replied.
Thoughtfully, she said, “I don’t think we have any cream cheese.”
“What?” I asked. To which, she said, “I think we have everything for banana dessert except the cream cheese.”
”I thought we were talking about a disposable aluminum pan. I think we have one at home,” I said.
”Yeah, that’s what I said. We have a disposable aluminum pan at home. I was thinking we could put the enchiladas in that,” she answered with a straight face.
Learning to really listen
Miscommunication can cause significant misunderstanding. When that happens, we not only lose clarity but risk damaging our relationships and our ability to work together. Distractions–whether it’s a cell phone, a lingering thought about work, or even just multitasking in the moment–make it harder to truly hear the people we care about.
Clear communication doesn’t just happen—it takes intention. When I slow down enough to listen fully, I realize that most confusion can be avoided. What I hear is shaped by where my attention is, and if it’s divided, chances are I’ll miss the heart of what’s being said. Miscommunication may start small, like a mix-up over cream cheese and aluminum pans, but left unchecked it can ripple into bigger misunderstandings. Choosing to be present—to set distractions aside and really listen—creates space for connection, understanding, and stronger relationships.