One of my favorite treats growing up was French fries dipped in a chocolate shake. The salty-sweet combination is so delicious. I am also a fan of salted caramel for the same reason.
The Sweet & Salty Moments
Recently, I watched the movie Inside Out 2. The emotion Joy learned that it was not helpful to push all of the less pleasant experiences and memories to the back of the mind. Instead, she discovered that all experiences are necessary to develop a strong sense of who we are.
The AA Big Book contains one of my favorite lines: we do not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. The bitter and sweet experiences of my life have led me to become the person that I am in this present moment. It is because of the sum total of all of my experiences that I am able to offer empathy, share kindness, and love without judgment. I can also talk about painful experiences in a way that can be beneficial to others who are hurting.
Embracing all of the Experiences
As a parent, it has been tempting to shelter them from life’s difficulties and hardships. I haven’t wanted to watch them suffer or be in pain. Yet, I know that the challenging experiences of life are what build character and strength.
Life can be bittersweet. It is filled with loss and joy. We experience health and sickness. If we are lucky, we will love and be loved. Yet, it is likely we will experience rejection, betrayal, and disconnection at some point. We will have salty tears and sweet moments. The combination of all these experiences creates a sense of identity and forges the type of person we are. Like Riley, the main character in Inside Out 2, I have come to the conclusion that “I am enough,” “I am a good person,” and “I do have something to contribute.”
Life’s Bittersweet Lessons
When the calendar marks what would have been my 30th wedding anniversary, I celebrate and mourn. When my adult child asks hard questions about the divorce, I’m honest without casting blame. I am a little kinder to myself for the moments of which I am not proud. I offer and receive forgiveness. And I cry when I think about how blessed I am to be alive, to be expecting two more grandchildren this year, and to have experienced so many amazing moments along the way. I savor it all like one of my favorite treats.